DAY 22/115

Today was a better day. I tried to make my focus on The Lord and not on how badly I had eaten over the weekend. So many little issues and bad habits that can seem overwhelming.

I read a devotional this morning about Lamentation 3:22-23

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. "The Lord is my portion," says my soul, "therefore I will hope in him." (Lamentations 3:22-24 ESV)

These verses really hit home with me today. I feel like Satan has a stronghold in my life right now. Feeling like I can't remain in control of my eating makes me feel defeated, incapable, and out of control. Basically like a failure. I know in my head that is not true. But my heart aches with the battle that is waging within my soul. I want to claim scripture like this and believe that God is bigger than any problem I face, including eating in an out of control-self destructive manner.

Then I feel bad because a part of me feels like it is ridiculous that food/eating/weight can be such an all consuming problem at times. I think other people have "real problems" like cancer, alcohol addiction, divorce etc. but the reality of each of our struggles is that they are uniquely our own. No matter how big or small the struggle, if it keeps our mind on ourselves or our problems and not on God, then Satan has won that battle.

I want my focus to be on God and how His mercies never end and how He is EVERYTHING I need EVERY day. It's no surprise to me that I used the word "control" more than once up above. I need to accept that I am not in control and willingly surrender my will to God's will. He really is EVERYTHING I need.

I was in bed at 9:30 and now I'm ready for sleep. Yay for going to bed at a decent time. Bob hadn't finished his card but I believe he did well today.


Sent from my iPhone

DAY 21/115

No cards to post tonight. Lots of thoughts running through my mind. I'm having a hard time sticking to my plan. I'm doing a lot of stress eating, not sure why. I think today had to do with choosing to visit a new church. Big decision, lots of emotions running high, lots of mindless eating. Trying to escape the uncomfortable feelings I guess.

Strategies to implement to help me navigate stress more successfully:
Clear tempting/unhealthy food out of house
Measure everything BEFORE I eat it.
If I find myself reaching for, or even craving unhealthy food, write down or meditate on empowering scripture.
Plans my whole days food ahead of time.
Get enough sleep.


Sent from my iPhone

DAY 20/115

Bob and I didn't log food yesterday. It was a bad day for both of us plus it was late and we had to be up early.

We got back on track today with diet. It is hard to make changes and be consistent.

DAY 18/115

Bob's card looks pretty good and his weight loss is great!

As for me, I don't really want to talk about it. At least I journaled. It's ugly, but it's in black and white, or should I say RED?

DAY 17/115

We both had decent days today. In bed now, trying for that magic 6 hours.

DAY 16/115

I had a great day. I got a little "snacky" this afternoon and I wasn't measuring but I believe I stayed within my calories. My sugar grams are high because I ate fruit and a Kind bar. I love the Kind bars but they have a decent amount of sugar grams, 10 grams in the one I ate today.

Bob was mostly red today. He either does really well or really poorly. It balances out but doesn't do much for his losing the weight.

The GREEN vs RED system is a good way to see if what you say matches up to your actions/choices. For instance, Bob and I have both said for years that we want to lose weight. However, the reality of consistently RED cards illustrates that we really don't want to lose weight. When I am 80% - 100% GREEN, my weight drops. The only person in control of my GREEN percentage is me. I have been messing around with this all summer. I'm going to really focus on being at least 80% GREEN every day and get the rest of my weight off. I want what I say to match what I do. It's a much more harmonious way to live.

DAY 15/115

My weight was up and although I was way over on calories yesterday, I didn't eat 2 LBS worth of extra food. I think the Chex mix (high sodium) late last night and no sleep caught up to me.

Bob's weight is stable but he is having a hard time being consistently more GREEN than RED. It takes a while to recognize bad habits and even longer to truly break the habits. He is getting there and I have full faith in him that he can change his habits and get his weight off.

DAY 14/115

Busy weekend. Hoping to be home tomorrow and have time to get the house straightened up and some lingering tasks accomplished.

I sat down tonight to go through the girls school paperwork, permission forms, picture order forms etc. I don't know why I felt stressed but I sat there and mindlessly ate chex mix. In small doses it is fine to eat, but in large quantities that I didn't bother to measure, it is just junk calories that hold zero nutritional value. Lots of crunch that comes at the cost of lots of calories and sodium. So not worth it!

DAY 13/115

I feel like we have experienced a positive swift in momentum. It really only takes one really good (100% GREEN) day to get me moving in the right direction.

DAY 12/115

Amazing how the weight drops after just one day if 100% GREEN!

DAY 11/115

Woohoo!! We were both 100% GREEN! It feels great to finally meet that goal but also to just sleep, eat right and exercise. So simple yet we make it so complicated by our poor choices. It really is just one healthy choice at a time, one day at a time.

DAY 10/115

Bob did great today! Much better on calories.
Ok
I struggled all day with cravings for carbs. I haven't felt well all day and no matter what I ate, it didn't satisfy my craving. I think that's. sign that I'm not really hungry for food. I'm needing something else, in this case, sleep. I'm out for the night.

DAY 8/115

Me: Going to bed earlier but still not early enough. Must get sleep.

Bob: Must get diet under control and get some sort of regular exercise.

Both: BE INTENTIONAL

DAY 8/115 SICK AND TIRED

Our weight was up and the only culprit was homemade hamburgers. Bob seasoned with lots of salt and other seasonings. They were delicious but in no way could account for true weight gain.

On another note, as I look back on today, I was SO hungry for carbs all day long. Lack of sleep is the cause of those cravings, I am guessing. Either way, as I sit here and type this post, at 1:45 a.m. I am disgusted with my inability to CHOOSE to get a decent amount of sleep every night. I'm also tired of sounding like a broken record in that I know what I need to do to be healthy, but I'm not doing those things. Isn't the definition of insanity doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results?

A very wise man once told me that in order to change, you have to get sick and tired of being sick and tired. Well, I am sick and tired, literally as well as figuratively. It is time to truly change.

DAY 7/115

Today was better for both of us. Very intentional to meet my 5 goals. Bob was close as well, he just didn't get enough water.

We had a very busy weekend and I stayed up too late getting organized and ready for the week ahead. Bootcamp begins again tomorrow. I want to go so I know I will be RED tomorrow for sleep. I need to manage my time better so I can get enough sleep!

DAY 6/115 We Need Momentum in the Right Direction

Today was better for Bob and I then yesterday, but was far from where we need to be. We are both having a hard time getting into the swing of things.

I am going to be very intentional about being 100% GREEN tomorrow. It only takes one day to get momentum going in the right direction. Today we stopped the train as it was barreling down the tracks in the wrong direction. Tomorrow, we will turn the train in the right direction and get it moving full steam ahead. A simplistic analogy, but it is pretty accurate. I'm beginning to turn the train by actually being in bed at a decent time. That will be 1 GREEN. Only 4 more to go!

DAY 5/115

Today was not a good day for either of us. My problem was lack of sleep, not exercising (I always eat better when I exercise), not drinking my water, not reading my Bible,
my schedule being out of whack due to the piano tuning man coming almost 4 hours late, and not having a plan for dinner at the football game. There was a lot that wasn't good today but lack of sleep is probably the biggest culprit of all.

As for Bob, he has developed very poor habits concerning eating (not a lot of healthy food) and rarely exercising. That is a difficult cycle to break. He says he is working his way into being mostly Green and I believe him. It is hard to change these types of unhealthy patterns. If it was easy, the US Center for Disease Control (CDC) wouldn't have reported that 35% of Americans are obese. Obesity is classified as having equal or greater than a 30 BMI (body mass index). 35% are obese, that doesn't even include the run of the mill overweight person. Of course it is difficult to change bad habits, but it is possible!

I think one if the first steps is to acknowledge what you are really doing to your body, and the card system is a great way to see the correlation between your habits and your weight. I know when I overeat, I used to go into denial mode and think, "Ou well, I'll start over tomorrow". Even now, I don't like to record the days I eat way over my calorie allotment. It is very uncomfortable to accept that I CHOOSE to put that much food and/or that kind of junky food into my body. Of course if I record the food as I eat it, I'm less likely to go over on calories because I can't deny the numbers when they're right in front of me.

DAY 4/115

I was up late tonight helping a friend on some things at her house. Ridiculously late bedtime. I have another friend who made an interesting discovery concerning "hidden" sugar in her diet. Will write more about that tomorrow. As you can tell from the cards, I need more sleep and Hubby needs to exercise. Since I'm an optimist, I'll look at those issues as areas where there is room for improvement!

DAY 3/115

We are both having excellent weight loss right now due to water loss and just not pigging out everyday. I imagine my weight is going to stabilize soon and I will be faced with the true amount of weight gain from the summer.

I'm really feeling good right now despite whatever weight gain has occurred. The accountability and success the Green vs Red system provides is amazing. I just have to worry about those 5 little things each day and my weight drops. I am very committed to getting down to at least 140 lbs by the end of this 115 day challenge. I haven't been that low of a weight in so long, I don't even remember what it feels like. I can only imagine that it will feel amazing!

I think my husband will see significant weight loss for a couple of weeks before his weight begins to drop at a more normal rate. He had another rough day with food choices. They celebrated a coworker's birthday today and I suspect that was a challenge with all the yummy food. The GREAT news is that he stayed within his calorie goal, logged his food, and completed his Green vs Red card. These kind of days are hard because you don't really get a lot of bang for your buck when you eat junk food. A couple of doughnuts can equal half a days allotment of calories! So not worth it.

I am so proud of my husband logging his food these last couple of days. I really think acknowledging what you eat and also your eating habits (eating due to stress, when you're tired etc) helps to identify habits that are not conducive to a healthy lifestyle. If you just mindlessly eat OR have the attitude of "I'm not going to worry about it today, I will just start tomorrow," you will never get your weight under control. The first step to creating HEALTHY habits is to recognize and be willing to change your UNHEALTHY ones! Keeping track of these 5 daily goals is the primary tool we have in our effort to change. Now, just 112 more days!

DAY 2/115

Bootcamp is not in session this week and I'm trying to take advantage of the break and rest my back (I've been having sciatic nerve issues). However, I did plan to walk or swim every day to get my exercise in and I haven't done that yet. So, my calories were on the high side today considering I didn't exercise. Sugar grams were high but that is from grapes, carrots and plums that I ate today. I'm not going to worry about it too much.

Bob was over on calories because be ate a bunch of junk food at work today. He did a good job this evening though because he chose to limit the damage done earlier in the day and he didn't eat dinner. He could have made a bad decision worse by adding more calories tonight but be didn't. He made a great choice to log what he had eaten and then take responsibility for his predicament and stop eating for the day. I think that is great progress for him. If he hadn't committed to the 115 days of tracking his progress and he hadn't given me permission to blog his progress, I suspect tonight would have turned out differently. There is something to be said for accountability!

115 DAY CHALLENGE--HUBBY ON BOARD

It's 115 days until 2014. The last 30 days for me have not been great on a healthy living scale. Exercise has been great, eating has been bad, very bad. I need to RE-ESTABLISH my healthy habits.

My husband, who has been tremendously supportive of my lifestyle change, is in desperate need of his own lifestyle makeover. His diet is poor, he doesn't exercise, he doesn't sleep well, he averages 20 oz of water a day, and his spiritual life could be better. He needs to establish healthy habits so he is a PRIME candidate for the Green vs Red system.

So we have agreed to work on meeting daily goals together every day for the next 115 days. I will post both of our cards every day. The idea is that instead of falling into the trap of "starting" our healthy lifestyle after Halloween (and all that candy) or Thanksgiving (and all that turkey and mashed potatoes) or Christmas (and all the yummy treats and favorite holiday dishes), we would begin today. You see, we will have a PLAN for healthy eating to navigate our way through those trigger points listed above.

Then when 2014 rolls around, we won't be sitting at an all time high weight like years past, depressed yet determined to "Start Over". We will be experiencing the satisfaction of first having accomplished a goal (staying on track for 115 days and changing habits) and we will also be thinner, have more energy and in my hubby's case, hopefully be getting more sleep.

Sounds like quite the plan. But one thing I know for sure, we can do it. I know we can.

NOT GOOD, NOT GOOD AT ALL

9/3/13--169 LBS
9/4/13--165.8 LBS

My weight is up a lot in two short weeks. I think my weight is inflated because I have been eating really unhealthy for two weeks. I think it will come down quite a bit in the next 2-3 days and then I will know the true damage I have done to my weight loss progress.

I have had little structure over this time period which makes my diet difficult for me to manage. It also proves to me that even though I have felt free of the emotional eating for the most part over the last several months, I can fall right back into old habits/mindsets very easily.

One of the most dangerous thoughts/behaviors I fall back on is to think, "I've blown it today, so I might as well eat anything and EVERYTHING I want to eat. I'll get back on track tomorrow (or when vacation ends, or company leaves, or after the holidays etc). That thinking is a big part of why I ended up so heavy to begin with. It's a little discouraging to see how easily I fell back into that thought pattern.

The good news is that I have clearly identified those thoughts as a weak area. I need to come up with some strategies to strengthen my ability to eat healthy regardless of the circumstances.

Here are some thoughts on that:

1. Have a plan of what I'm going to eat. If a big (or special) meal is on the agenda, make the healthiest choices I can. Also, cut back in other areas during the day or exercise a little more to accommodate for the extra calories.

2. Drink my water.

3. Ditch the ALL or NOTHING attitude. One cookie (or bowl of ice cream, or piece of brownie etc) does NOT "blow my weight loss efforts." That is called life.

4. MODERATION is the key to successful weight loss management. I do not HAVE to overindulge when I eat something sweet. I have just trained my mind and body to go completely overboard when I do eat a sweet treat. I RARELY, if ever, eat a normal portion of sweets. I'm not a victim in that situation. Half a pan of brownies has never walked out of the pan and into my mouth. Seriously, I need to grow up and face reality. I'm doing that to myself. Good news is, if I can choose to eat like that, I can choose NOT TO!!

I'm sure there are more ideas of things that would help but I think #4 is where I'm going to leave it for now. #4 is also where I'm going to start tomorrow.